Choosing Battles

I am such a fool. Why is it I pick my battles carefully when my kids are little but as soon as they grow up we are fighting about everything. For example, I let my four year old wear what she feels is going to make her "popular". Those are her words. Infact she sometimes looks like a real goof, but yesterday I was fighting with my 10 year old over what she was going to wear sledding. How dumb is that. It is no wonder I am over stressed. Then my X emails me and says some nasty things. Now why should I care what he thinks about me. He is my X for a reason. When and why did I stop choosing my battles. Boy do I have some work to do to regain myself.