Long Time

I know it has been a long time since I have been here. I have been too busy as I am sure everyone has. We had a great Christmas and I hope everyone else did too. On Christmas eve we had friends over and we played games. It felt like we were real people for one night. Santa was good to everyone and the kids really enjoyed themselves. It has been pretty warm here. All the snow is gone now and it is drizzleing outside. Atleast it is warmer, that cold brought me down.
Lately I have been reading about King Henery VIII and his wives. Good stuff and I just finished about the fight between Queen Mary and Princess Elizabeth for the crown. Now I want to read about Queen Elizabeth the I. I love that stuff. It is not romantic like Disney makes it out to be. There is so much back stabbing and betrayal. Good Stuff, Good Stuff.
The kids want me to take them to Chuckie cheese today so I must be off. Have a grand day!

Gray

28 and gray. I found 2 gray hairs at my temple the other day. It is a trait in the family for the women to go gray early but I was hopeing to get my father's genes. In his family they don't go gray til' they arre in their 60's. Not fair. I feel old. I didn't want to look old as well. Well, the only thing I can do is keep coloring it. ho hum.

It is Christmas time in the city

Why don't I feel the magic? My Christmas stuff is up. We put it up together,My gifts are bought and some wrapped.Why haven't I felt the excitement, the peace. What is the matter with me? I am just going on like I do everyday and don't feel a thing. WHY? It is staring to irratate me that I am not enjoying this season. I don't know why. Where did my joy go?
Maybe the fact that I am trying to save the planet everyday of my life it has sucked the joy out of me. I deal with so much that i forgot where to find the joy. Is that it? Or is it something else? Is there something wrong with me? I think there is. I didn't find anyjoy when my husband and I went out the other night either. It is me. I guess it takes more than 2 thearpy sessions to be better.

My Family

My 10 year old daughter has such a nasty attitude. You would think she was a teen. I took her shopping yesterday for a present for school and I warned her 5 mins. ahesd of time that we were going soon. It was just her and I going, I thought she would enjoy it. She gave me such a bad attitude when I told her it was time to go that I thought about not taking her at all. I try to do things with my kids one on one. If we can't do that I try to do stuff that we all enjoy. She just has such a bad attitude about everything that all I want to do is slap her. Sometimes I just let it go. Other times it really flares my temper.
My mom used to play games with me. I remember that she tought me every card game I know, not black jack my Uncle Lenn tought me how to play that. I enjoyed spending this time with her and thought my kids would enjoy spending time with me. I don't know. Kids, why are they so strange?

Baking

"Oh, the waether outside is frightful, but the fire inside is so delightful..." The weather outside is just nasty. It is freezing rain! Yuck. Good day to bake however. Yesterday I made no bake cookies. They turned out too soft. I think that is because I used the tub soft butter and not the hard stick butter. That would have made the difference, I think. I was thinking of making cut out cookies today and sending some to our elderly neighbors. I seen that some one had a bucket of coal forsale in the paper. I am considering buying it and giving it to our nasty neighbors. Writing on the card From: the neighborhood. Bah, Humbug. But the Christmas spirt has a hold of me and I do think that would go over to well. I guess I will go watch the Little mermaid with my four year old and then consider baking. Merry Chirstmas to all and to all a good night.

Choosing Battles

I am such a fool. Why is it I pick my battles carefully when my kids are little but as soon as they grow up we are fighting about everything. For example, I let my four year old wear what she feels is going to make her "popular". Those are her words. Infact she sometimes looks like a real goof, but yesterday I was fighting with my 10 year old over what she was going to wear sledding. How dumb is that. It is no wonder I am over stressed. Then my X emails me and says some nasty things. Now why should I care what he thinks about me. He is my X for a reason. When and why did I stop choosing my battles. Boy do I have some work to do to regain myself.

I was not...

I was not a greedy child. Infact I hardly asked for anything. I have passed the trait on to my daughters but unfourtanaly not my son. Do you know he gave me a 4 page Christmas list, front and back! The girls were lucky if they had 4 things on theirs. He did however buy something for everyone in the family, including the dog at his Santa shop on $5. Atleast he evens everything out. I teach all my kids about giving, nomatter what time of year it is, nomatter how poor we are. Whether it is change to the Salvation Army or Cookies,or bread for our neighbors. The nice ones that is. I should find coal for the mean ones! I hope that these lessons stay with them always. No matter what your situation there is always someone out there worse off. Even if it doesn't see possible.

One Christmas Day

When I was younger my dad had a truck that had a cab over the back. My brothers and I had to ride in the back because there was not enough room up front. I always thought it was cool to have our own private spot. We could say and do pretty much anything, as long as mom and dad didn't catch us. Mind you there was no heat going through this so it could get cold in the winter. I didn't mind much. My dad had put an old foam matteress back there for us to sit on and we had blankets to keep us warm. One Christmas Day we went to my grandma's house riding in the back of the truck. I remember the ride well. It was so quiet out. I don't remember another car on the road. There was plenty of snow on the ground but none falling from the sky. I sat back there and watched the countryside go by and all the way there I sang "Over the River and Through The Woods". Strange, that is all I remember of that day.

A bunch of things

I don't think that my brother is doing as well living at my house as he should be. He is bord and when he gets bord he goes out. Last night he was at the bar for 6 hours! I know he had been drinking a lot because he made a hell of a lot of noise when he came home. He tries to be respectful, but sometimes he forgets that he sleeps in my sons room and all of the kids' rooms are connected. The money he spent last night he should have sent to my dad as part of pay back for paying his bills. There is only so much that I can say to him. Maybe he won't go out this weekend though. I want to help him but I can't if he won't help himself.
I spent this morning mopping half of my basement floor. Oh what a chore that was. I want the kids to be able to play down there so that is what I had to do. There is so much that needs to be done today. I have an appointment at 2 that I have to take the 4 year old with me to. Yippeee.
Last night I went to a poetry reading and it was really good. The guy kept his voice at an even tone but the poems themselves created the pictures in your mind.
I have nothing to wear to my husbands Christmas party. This is rather upsetting to me because I gained weight and this is why I have nothing to wear. I feel like a fat pig and yet the food still finds it way to my mouth.!

Everyday

My 4 year old asks me everyday if it is Christmas. Every night we watch a Christmas cartoon that is on TV.
I remember the year my mom told me that her and Dad were Santa. I won't beleive it. In fact every year after that I tried really hard to prove her wrong. I still beleive in the spirt of Santa. I am not going to tell my kids that Santa isn't real. I'm going to go ahesd and let them beleive for as long as they want. I always tell them that as long as they beleive in Santa then he is real. Yes, my children there really is a Santa Clause.

No one Noticed!!

No one even noticed I spelled girls wrong on my blogger name! Infact I just noticed myself. I have done some 65 blogs and am now just noticeing my mistake. That jsut shows that I hardly proof read. Who has time for that?!

My Husband's Christmas gift

I am giving my husband a gift this year that I don't think even I will ever top. His favorite baseball player is Reggie Jackson, when he played for the Yankees. I bought him a jersey that is an authentic replica and Reggie Jackson has signed it. It has with it a certificate of authenticity too. I bought it for only $95.00! I am so excited I can hardly stop myself from giving him hints about it. I have been saving my money especially for his Christmas gift. He is very hard to buy for. me on the other hand am excited when I get fuzzy warm socks. That is just the way I am I guess. I am making Christmas ordaments for my friends. I know they will like those. Well, have a calm shopping trip for those who go out on the crazy weekends!